It somehow sounds scarier than travelling alone, but travelling with a group of strangers youâve only just met can be enormously liberating. With modern technology, it isnât hard to run a quick, if not thorough background check in a few second.
If youâre travelling with a group of strangers youâll always have the organisers to fall back on. But what makes it better than doing it all alone instead of travelling with people you know and love?
First of all, itâs as much a route to self-discovery as travelling alone. Constant introductions and relationships with people outside of your comfort zone force you into defining yourself, and test whatever self-concept you had been working with all this while.
People who donât know if theyâre ever going to see you again arenât likely to tiptoe around your feelings, and theyâre more likely to give you an honest reflection of yourself than your close friends. The fifth time you tell someone youâre an avid reader, it may just occur to you that you havenât really cracked open a book in a while.
Most importantly, you get to re-invent yourself, or simply bring out shades you may have kept hidden because it just didnât fit in with who your family or friends thought you should be.
Start travelling! (Photo Credit – Avel Chuklanov)
Now get out there and travel. And if youâre still not ready for it, here are some tips to help you work up the nerve.
Donât hesitate
The great thing about travelling with strangers/semi-solo is that you donât have to wait for anybody else. If your buddies canât seem to line up their work leave with yours, or a roommate just canât seem to save up as fast as you, just pack your bags and hit the road.
The best part is, when it comes to travelling with strangers, this never ends. Â If youâve made some friends in a new city and youâve been exploring with them for nearly a week, they may start to fray your nerves a bit.
Just say your goodbyes and move on. Making lasting connections while travelling doesnât mean hanging around and being polite when youâd rather just be gone.
Simply pack your bags and hit the road (Photo Credit – ŕ¸ŕ¸´ŕ¸ŕ¸´ ว฾ระสูŕ¸ŕ¸ŕ¸´)
As you start your first hesitant introductions, your people skills are getting ready to soar through the roof. Itâs no cakewalk starting a conversation with a bunch of strangers, even if you have been forced together by fate, or an overzealous travel company.
Soon youâll be able to gauge body language and facial expressions, even broaden your knowledge of cultural differences in socialising. If nothing else, you may just find out what pick-up line or ice-breaker works best for you. A skill thatâs sure to come in handy later on.
Don’t be hesitant to introduce yourself first (Photo Credit – Alexis Brown)
Have a little faith
Granted, these are strangers youâre travelling with, but theyâre here for much the same reasons as you. Just like you, they too are often in the same delirious state between being overjoyed and exhausted.
They may not be the people you hung around with in diapers, but youâve got to trust a little bit and open up if you want some genuine human contact.
Little faith and trust will help you build up genuine connections and memories for life (Photo Credit – Roberto Nickson)
Did you proudly interrupt the guide to share a fact that they later scathingly proved incorrect? Did you have one too many at the bar crawl and throw up on not one but all three of your shiny new friends? Who cares!
Whatâs past is past and youâre never going to see them again anyway. Lock it away in your secret wild nights and terrible shames box.
Forget the negatives & enjoy the positive! (Photo Credit – StockSnap)
Donât be afraid to shut the door
Unlike your long term friends whoâd think nothing of barging in on you for a casual chat at 3 in the morning, or take offence if you change plans without warning, your new friends are still going to maintain some polite boundaries.
Head out on the city with just your camera in tow and expect bright smiles and welcoming arms when you make it back for 8 oâclock drinks.
New friends have less expectations and will always welcome you with bright smiles (Photo Credit – Helena Lopes)
There is safety in numbers
We are not talking group size, but age. For starters, the bodyâs capabilities change with age, and you donât want to be left standing awkwardly off to one side as the 20-somethings jump screaming into the white water rafts.
Youâre already being thrown into a chaotic world of strangers, all new sights and sounds and smells. So itâs good to have someone around whoâs processing it at the same pace as you.
Opt for age-category specific tours. This isnât anywhere close to a fast rule though, those who can break it, know who they are.
Opt for a group with same-age category to enjoy your trip to the fullest (Photo Credit – Matheus Ferrero)
Have something to share with your fellow travellers
Itâs good to come to the table prepared with something that can help cement your place in the group. Don’t hesitate to share a kickass playlist, home-cooked snacks or riveting stories as they also act as an ice-breaker.
Sharing food, drinks and ideas makes the best evening (Photo Credit – Kelly Sikkema)
Be on time
If youâve made a plan to be somewhere, stick to it. Your new friends may not be comfortable calling you over and over again to wake you up or otherwise check on you, and you shouldnât cost them their trip as well.
Theyâre either going to just leave you behind or never invite you anywhere again. Be careful what you sign up for.
Since you’re less likely to be seeking approval from your temporary friends, you’re less likely to get peer pressured into any activities you won’t enjoy. If you think you’re going to hold back the group, just say no.
Be on time! (Photo Credit – Sanah Suvarna)
Here is our blog which talks about our top ten tips for travelling solo in India. In case you are not sure if you are a group traveller or solo traveller, here is a blog that will help you understand your travel style. Are you ready for it? Feel free to contact us for more details and travel plans.
We all know India as crazy, scary, chaotic, but that didn’t stop you from booking the tickets anyway, did it? So we’ll do our bit and give you the inside scoop on keeping your guard up without missing out. Here’s a couple of things we thought you’d like to be ready for.
Expect the unexpected- Photo Credit Suket Dedhia
Culture Shock
The first thing youâre going to have to get used to is that itâs quite a small country for its sizeable population. Especially in the big cities where youâre most likely to land, youâll find that personal space is a laughable concept. Trains are packed to the brim. People literally hang out the doors. Bumping, pushing and shoving is par for the course, as is a neighbouring passenger nodding off on your shoulder or a beggar child grabbing at your arm. Prepare yourself for this, or opt for a privately driven car on your first day until you think youâre ready.
A great way to ease into the chaos is to start with a homestay. Allow your hosts to explain and entertain over a couple of dozen cups of tea and maybe even hold your hand when you first venture out. Be sure to inform them in advance if youâd like the help so they can pencil it into their calendars. Most hosts are as keen to know about your life as you are about theirs, so donât hold back.
Local Interest
Finally, prepare yourself for the staring. As a foreigner, youâre a source of local interest in even the most tourist saturated neighbourhoods. While conservative dressing for women may help, itâs a decision you can make on your own, and one, many Indian women themselves are rejecting. Just remember that the sort of people that stare will stare irrespective of your clothing, so you might as well be comfortable. That said, itâs understandably difficult to make this choice when you canât speak the local language or fully understand the nuances of a social situation, so good luck! Youâll probably be asked at some point to pose with somebody for a photo, Iâd recommend against it since these are usually for bragging rights. As a woman regardless of your skin, youâre likely to be subject to eve-teasing in some form or the other, for which Iâd recommend referring to our post on legal remedies if anything ever crosses a line.
Conservative dress may be best (Photo Credit – Suffix)
Dealing with People
India has a long-respected tradition of groveling before authority, one that youâd be better off maintaining. Donât give in to anything you donât agree with, but always, always, be respectful. Use a measured tone and donât raise your voice. Be confident, and stick to your guns, but very politely.
From the minute your foot hits the pavement, youâll be engulfed in a swarm of adorably grubby beggar children, suave young âguidesâ and the like. Guidebooks will tell you to firmly refuse or ignore them, though bemused detachment works just as well if youâre not the confrontational type. Just smile, shake your head and walk away, thereâs only so far theyâll bother to follow you.
If you do end up in a heated situation, switch over 100% to damage control. Itâs best not to get involved at all. If you see something going down and you want to intervene, call the cops. You can also draw the attention of the local authority be it, hotel manager or security guard. While the law will recompense eventually, itâs an incredibly slow and arduous process that you do not want to get caught up in.
No city in India doesn’t come with a crowd (Photo Credit – PD Pics)
The traffic
Another thing thatâll disorient you is the traffic. Honking doesnât really have to mean anything. Itâs just a way to vent some rage in traffic, call out to a friend or pass the time! Crossing the road is a great and thrilling adventure. Just pick a likely looking crown on a footpath and bury yourself within them as they weave through moving traffic with a single hand raised nonchalantly to alert the racing cars. Traffic rarely halts before the zebra crossing and jumps red lights for sport. Itâs terrifying and exhilarating all at the same time!
Crossing the road can be exhilarating (Photo Credit – Thomas Gerlach)
Avoiding Danger
There are a few rules that all travellers have learned by rote when it comes to a new city. Donât travel by night, make fake phone calls, pre-book travel, stay off the shadowy side streets – but only until youâre confident. Thereâs no reason for you to cower away forever. But itâs good to have a sense of the city and its people before you run around taking risks willy-nilly.
Be safe and donât forget to call home!
If you need any assistance, simply get in touch with us or hit the Plan Your Trip button. We will help plan your dream trip to this vast subcontinent.
If you have a sense of the city, then it becomes easier to go along (Photo Credit – Makalu)
Five months into my amazing India travel experience as a solo female, made possible by India Somedayâs absolutely brilliant You Wander We Pay contest, I bear good news. Iâm alive and well, perhaps even glowing, as I dream about where to venture next in this country of chaos and charm.
Probably not what you would expect to read if you, like many others I know, have been too daunted to make your way to India. Deterred by the countless blogs which warn women endlessly about the dirt, disorder and demeaning behaviour of the âterrible male species.â
Well, here are six thoughts I think you should keep in mind if heading this way. And fear not, they are not designed to scare the chapatti out of you!
Mehendi on hands (Photo Credit – Pablo Heimplatz)
Itâs pretty damn amazing here! Mind the media!
All too often, itâs the gloom and doom of life thatâs presented to us in our media, instilling fear and emphasizing negativity. Keep that in mind! Iâm not suggesting bad things donât happen – they surely do, all over the world.
And huge kudos to those who share their experiences and raise critical awareness of gender-based violence of any sort. So I say yes, read it all! Hear the important voices of survivors and fellow travellers, increasing awareness and sharing safety tips. There is lots of good advice out there.
Just beware! Itâs not the full story! There are thousands of us women who are having stellar, incident-free expeditions through India. Immersing in the culture and commotion, day and night, in cities and villages, with women and men. We’re more than safe, weâre having the time of our lives!
They each have a different success story to tell (Photo Credit – Find Your Feet, Flickr)
You will be stared at – You are fascinating!
Whether youâre on the Metro platform in Delhi or walking through a small village in Uttarakhand, you WILL be stared at. You can count on it.  All the more so if you have very fair skin or blonde curly hair! Iâve had people literally come stand a foot away from me, looking me up and down, or even sneaking selfie shots with me, as if I wouldnât notice.
Many women travellers are horrified by this and have told me they feel like sexual objects. While I can empathize, knowing we carry with us our personal and shared histories as women, I personally feel more like an object of cultural curiosity and am not at all offended. Isnât that a big part of why weâre here too?! One of my favourite parts of travelling in India is the amazing parade of people. I could watch and stare all day!
So yes, I do feel eyes on me, but I feel more like a walking museum of western life than a sexual object. I can feel their fascination with my white skin, my freckles, my smile, my jewellery, my clothes, my bag, my shoes. I feel them wondering about who I am, what I do, how I think, not just what I look like naked. And trust me, I do know that feeling of being objectified – I just happen to feel it much more on the streets of New York City than here in India.
Of course, as with anywhere, there will be some obnoxious souls you might encounter. Indian men will often be the first to warn you about them. But, after 5 months of some pretty intense travel through cities and villages, using public transportation, and following my gut, Iâm happy to say that I donât think thatâs the norm. Some men, in fact, might not even look at you at all, declining eye contact even while youâre in a conversation.
Let your guard down and be as open as possible to other walks of life
Positive Energy is Palpable! Being present. Being open.
Iâve been blown away by the positive energy here in India. Perhaps itâs one of my favourite parts of this country. Iâve travelled to many places around the world and never have I felt so much positivity. From the breathtaking natural environments of wide-open deserts (Jaisalmer, Rann of Kutch), to the stunning mountains of Uttarakhand and Himachal Pradesh.
The powerful rivers, the glorious beaches, the endless farmland, and even the chaotic streets are filled with people and cows. The beauty of the land coupled by the brilliant colours of clothing and other textiles can almost even be over-stimulating and nourishing for the eyes and soul! And then there are the people – for whom the answer to any question is âyes, possible!â
Take it in! Breathe it! Be present and live in the moment! Savour it! Feel its healing power! Let your guard down!
Put those fear-mongering blogs in the back of your mind – and get to know the locals, even the men! Many travellers come to India and spend their time only seeing sites and enjoying the comforts of their accommodations.
But being open to the people and culture will truly enrich your experience. It will also get you the directions and guidance you need, sometimes without even asking (the majority of people simply want to connect with you and help – not get in your pants!)
The eye contact to be made, with women and men alike, especially while circling the white marble floors of the Golden Temple grounds, is unlike anything Iâve ever experienced. Even while on buses or walking the streets, connecting eyes and exchanging genuine smiles (and perhaps ahead bobble too) is powerfully beautiful – and harmless!
The majority of people, women and men, are sincerely interested in you culturally. Hence, offering you chai because of their Indian hospitality and to interact with you, as a human.
Let your guard down (to whatever extent feels comfy and safe) and be as open as you can to the stellar people here. I for one have found myself eating the most delicious meals, experiencing the incredible wildlife and even dressing in full traditional Kutch exquisite handmade clothing – all because of my openness.
Embracing the positivity, and moving the fear factor to the backseat (still need the info to inform your gut) will surely offer you a truly memorable India experience.
Here is your chance to meet a mixture of interesting friends to make your trip more memorable
Strength in Numbers!
No, I donât mean its better to travel with a crowd, though at times, it sure is fun! I mean there are TONS of us out here. Every week, Iâm newly inspired and empowered by the calibre of solo women travellers I meet.
And not just westerners. To many Indiansâ surprise, I regularly meet awesome Indian women. Women who have quit their conventional jobs, donned their backpacks and are out exploring their incredible country. Many of them blogging about it too. Many others are venturing out for long weekends and shorter trips, plotting their grand plans for longer-term adventures.
We draw strength and passion from each other. We, women, are oozing with cultural curiosity, passion for nature and desire for healing, self-growth and connection, both for ourselves and others.
Despite our masses, many will still be uber impressed by how brave you are (little do they know how much easier it often is to travel solo). You will still frequently be asked if you are single if you have kids and why not! Roll with the questions, as you like, having fun and embracing the opportunity for dialogue, even if it feels better to white-lie your answers.
All the more interesting if you connect with local women and womenâs organizations, bearing witness to their experiences too. One of my favourite moments was chitchatting about periods with the 14 and 19-year-old sisters from Dharamkot whose home I stay in. They loved my diva cup (definitely something I recommend for all menstruating travellers!)
Such an amazing collection of women I feel honoured to now know and learn from (and with). From a 19-year-old German navigating her way through Rajasthan to the Indian woman who left her marriage and is seeking my travel suggestions. Also, to the Brit in her 70s covering more of the unbeaten path than any other woman Iâve met.
An incredible sisterhood – inspiring, empowering, and making a change!
On the go, travel buddies
Being your true self
The more you travel and the more you live, the more you know what makes you tick. What inspires you, challenges you, nourishes you, strengthens you, brings you the most fun and the list could go on. Go after those things and go at the pace that feels right for you.
Even if it means straying from the path that youâve read about, things youâre âsupposed to doâ or see others doing. This has landed me in the most amazing local and nature scenes, leading me from one great opportunity to the next.
Remember that there are no wrong turns. If you miss seeing a palace, itâs probably because you had an eye-opening conversation or were in a beautiful park. India is a thoroughly overstimulating place!
Staying in one area and unfolding the many layers; moving on to experience another terrain, language, style and cuisine; or venturing to a meditation or yoga retreat – all will offer endless anthropological phenomenon.
In India, when asked âwhy,â the answer is often âwhy not?â If you keep this philosophy in mind, following your instincts and true-self will be all the more fun.
Travel to find yourself
Good decisions and following your gut (a few little tips)
5 incident-free months of amazing travel through India (not even Delhi Belly!) I realize I might indeed be blessed with some good fortune. Iâve also followed some decent advice for making wise decisions. Even though it sometimes means sacrificing something my âtrue selfâ (see above) would want to wear or do! Here are some of the tips I find most helpful.
Dive Into India’s Textiles
Have I mentioned the vibrant colours and amazing patterns of all the textiles and clothing? Well, dive in! Leave your spaghetti-strap tanks at home (in fact, leave everything at home and carry the lightest bag possible!) Hit the markets and shop for some colourful scarves and cotton kurtas (loose, long tunics worn by Indian women).
The hardest part will be choosing! Or wear other clothing that keeps you covered. India is a pretty conservative country. Covering your shoulders and legs might make you a little hotter temperature-wise. But youâre bound to feel much comfier in other ways. It will certainly help make the inevitable staring feel benign and a colourful kurta will earn you an extra smile or two.
Enjoy the conversation
Youâll be asked over and over again about what country youâre from. And often the convo can become much more substantive and interesting. Get into it, enjoy it – and as you should anywhere, have your clear set of boundaries. Be ready to ease yourself out of the conversation as soon as you get any sort of âickyâ feeling.
Indulge in stargazing
The stars can be incredible here. Nothing like stargazing in the countryside, where the dearth of electricity means little light pollution. It’s not easy to hold me back from a good night walk, especially when my strong instincts donât smell any danger. But I make that sacrifice, both in cities and in villages. I donât do a lot of walking alone outside at night.
Thankfully, thereâs almost always something fun going on to watch, talk about, cook, eat or play inside!
Colourfully dressed Rajasthan women (Photo credit – Suffix)
Take the local transport
Local is often better. In big cities, I love taking public transportation and to get between cities and states, the trains and buses are stellar. Look out for âall-womenâ cars on local trains, usually all the way at the front or back.
Amazing to ride with so much fun colour and energy. A packed car full of traditional women carrying things on their heads and contemporary women heading to a whole array of jobs. There are even special lines for women to purchase tickets and some cities now have a fleet of all-women rickshaws.
Train Travel
For long train travel, I recommend either 2nd class AC or Sleeper Car. In Sleeper, the top bunk is best. There are lots of stories out there of women who have been groped on trains. However, I have yet to meet someone this has happened to. I love Sleeper Class because itâs always easy to connect with trusted Indian women, many travelling with their families.
They will happily keep an eye on your bag when you go to the bathroom. And they will also offer you some of the home-cooked food they brought on their journey. Lots of peddlers and other people will keep coming in and out of the train car. Hence, being on the top bunk gives you a safe place for your bags and lets you take it all in from a distance. I LOVE these train rides.
Sleeper Buses
Overnight sleeper buses are pretty great too; though beware of the double sleeper. As the name suggests, it is meant for two. And unless you know who youâre sharing it with, itâs probably not a good idea! Again, the upper level is more private but the bottom level is definitely less bumpy!
Bottom line ladies, as you would/should anywhere in the world, my best advice while travelling India is to be aware, use common sense and follow your gut. Make sure to enjoy the fabulous people and positive energy of this blessed country!
Namaste!
Thank you to India Someday, You Wander We Pay, and Incredible India.
A blog written by Nicky Millar on where is best to visit in Kerala. She gives tips for female solo travel in Kerala from a first-hand perspective.Â
Kerala is arguably one of the best places to visit in India. From rolling tea plantations, sweeping game reserves to mystical backwaters. Not to mention the food, people, and climate – this place has everything!
Boat in the backwaters of Kerala
Kumily and Periyar National Park, Kerala
I started my Kerala adventure in Kumily because mudslides prevented me from getting to Munnar, which is the place to go see tea plantations. Although the weather was a little grim at the end of the monsoon period, I felt it to be a worthwhile trip.
I decided to get an auto-rickshaw tour guide. This was the first time I had done this sort of thing. But given the distance between the sites, it was well worth it. I ventured from a coffee factory to an ayurvedic spice farm, a tea plantation and finally, a view of the town that I hear is breathtaking.
The only downside was not being able to visit the Periyar Game Reserve due to extortionist prices if one is travelling alone. One of my tips for solo female travel in Kerala is that the safaris, although expensive.
If you donât have any friends to fill that vehicle with, well then I am sorry for you. To be fair, I believe that you could go on the boat, which I am sure is fab, but I highly doubt whether wildlife spotting would be the greatest of priorities on a ferry full of families.
A deer
Visiting the Backwaters in Kerala
My advice for solo female travel in Kerala is that you are able to do just as much as you had hoped for. Visiting the backwaters is definitely a must-see adventure. After only one night (enough if you are not doing the parks), I got the bus to Kottayam and then the local ferry to Alleppey.
Although seemingly long-winded, the trip is well worth your time as you meander through the backwaters. This is at not even a tenth of the price of tourist cruises, and you have the added bonus of getting a sneak preview into the lives of the people who live along these canals.
Being the only foreigner on board there was a fabulous atmosphere and feeling of authenticity that you cannot buy for any amount of money!
My lack of friends was glaringly obvious once again when I arrived in Alleppey. It was here that I found that the houseboats are rented out individually at unattainable prices for a single-backpacker budget. Having spied them from my ferry ride, I have no doubt that it would have been a special experience.
If you are able to hire out a houseboat then I recommend staying for more than one night. This will allow you to get away from the throngs of other boats moored up alongside you. I decided to move on after one night. I got an easy bus to Ernakulam then caught a ferry to Fort Kochi.
Backwaters in Alleppey
Exploring and eating in Fort Kochi
What a wonderful city, super quaint with an eclectic mix of tourist shops/restaurants and local flavour. Though it is hungry work, I highly advise you to explore the old Jewish quarters by foot and boy was I rewarded that night! I ate possibly my single most favourite meal to date here.
Near the Chinese fishing nets, there is a fish market where you can pick out which of the day’s fresh catch tickles your fancy. I chose the squid, snapper and a dash of tiger prawns (I did share with a fellow solo traveller, donât worry).
Once you have sussed this, a little man magically appears to guide you to his restaurant. This is where he cooks the seafood to perfection – grill/fry/spicy/herby you name it! All for a nice INR 210, I could get used to that!
Another activity I decided to do was a proper backwater tour. There are companies that conveniently source a whole bunch of singles/small groups and take them together! There are easier options if you chose to do solo female travel in Kerala. Although I ummed and ahhed for a long while about going, I am so glad I did!
While the ferry from Kottayam was great, it is unable to give you a sense of the smaller, more jungle-like backwaters. Therefore a full day trip, with lunch included, was certainly time well spent!
Overall, while Kerala has some of the most spectacular scenery on offer, it may be worthwhile doing some research into prices if you are doing it solo or perhaps looking into tour groups.
A great tip for women travelling in Kerala is to just be flexible and willing to adjust. You can get just as much out of it as you desire.
